The Itch...

So here I am, prit near 37 weeks pregnant, and all I can think about is EMS.

WTF?!?! Talk about a time in my life when I am the farthest from my passion, that I find myself reminiscing about all the old calls, the old squad, the new FD I never really even had a chance to get my teeth into before the "surprise!".

I am a trauma junkie, and find myself oohing and ahhing over the most horrific pictures I can find on the Internet of recent trauma (Thank you 1st responder broadcast network!). Then I find myself forwarding them or talking to my FF/EMT brother about them.

Will I ever get back into it like I did before children? Will I find EMS in NH is as fulfilling as riding crew in urban NJ? I do not know. When I had my pager on, it seemed all that was happening when I was home was the PITA fire alarm activations... GRRR.

Maybe it is because my 9-5 job has turned up the suck factor. That being a Biochemist has seemed hollow and meaningless lately. No great "AH HA!" discoveries or anything. That my career has turned into nothing but a job with a paycheck. (No sir, I am not disgruntled :)

Oh well.. All I can say is that in 4 weeks (+ or - 2) my life will change yet again, with a brandy new DD to turn my life upside down and show me that there is more worth fighting for.